Finals week was on its way, no matter how much Amanda didn't want it to 
be.  Amanda had always been a good student in high school.  She'd done 
what little studying was required, and taken the "hard" classes.

But college was different.  In high school there had been class 
discussions and worksheets.  Now there were just lectures and mountains 
of reading.

It wasn't like she didn't like reading, either.  Quite the opposite; 
she loved it.  She had a long bookshelf with all sorts treats, from 
classics like _A Tale of Two Cities_ to the latest thrillers from King 
and Koontz.

Her favorites, however, were buried in the stack of romance novels that 
she kept tucked hidden under her bed.  There was nothing in the stack 
that was too racy, but she still didn't care to have them on her shelf 
for everyone to see.

Right now she was wishing that was the heroine in one of those three 
dollar novels, in the strong arms of the fierce Indian, or those of the 
dashing newspaper reporter.  Or she would maybe in the arms of her 
boyfriend, John, or perhaps even...

She didn't finish her thought - didn't let herself finish her thought - 
returning to her Geology text with a small sigh.

It was getting late now, and she had already moved herself from the 
large oak desk in the corner to her bed.  An hour ago she had brushed 
her teeth and changed into her loose flannel pajamas, and now she was 
snuggled in under her thick comforters between and between smooth 
sheets.  This was no time for sleep, however, as she sat up reading 
about rock formations scribbling notes by the light of a small lamp and 
the vanilla scented candle that she liked to keep lit while she was 
studying.

It's too late to think about rocks and canyons and cliffs, she thought, 
sliding down further into the bed.  Geology was pretty interesting, but 
there was a limit, and right now it was just making her bored and tired 
and stressed.

She dropped the notes on the floor, deciding to concentrate on just 
reading the material without falling asleep for now.  She shoved her 
left hand, which she had been scribbling the notes with, under the 
covers against the dorm air that was always not quite warm enough, and 
flipped pages carefully using the thumb of the hand holding the book.

Small bits of fantasies began to creep into her thoughts now as she 
struggled through the book.  Reading about rocky desert canyons she 
would find herself envisioning making love in the tent perched on the 
edge of figure 1a.  Reading about the smooth pebbles on a beach she 
could imagine herself as part of the couple kissing passionately in the 
corner of figure 2c.

She drew herself out of her fantasies for a second, and was surprised 
to find her hand resting in the warmth between her flannel pajama 
bottoms and the edge of her cottony purple panties.  Letting her book 
rest over her stomach - for just a second, she told herself - she 
closed her eyes and concentrated on the small curves of her belly as 
she could feel them through the unmoving hand.

Under her palm rested the soft contours of her belly and the small 
valley of her navel.  Beneath the very tips of her finger should could 
feel the almost springy cushion of hair beneath her panties.

Still without ever moving her hand, without touching herself - really 
touching herself - she inhaled the sensual scent of vanilla, and the 
images came crashed into her mind.

There were vague, at first, with soft edges, almost like old memories 
almost forgotten.  Some, perhaps, were memories, of times with John, or 
the one before, or, for a fleeting second before she chased it out, the 
time with him.  [ed: Who is "him?" Read "Homecoming": 
http://www.angelfire.com/art/AlfredE65/text/homecoming.txt]

She lay like that for a long time, simply drinking in the sensations, 
feeling the environment act on her without attempting to change it, and 
letting the images percolate in her mind.

It wasn't long before she could feel the beginnings of arousal as she 
lay still, save for the slow, steady rise and fall of breathing.  Just 
beyond the tips of her fingers she knew - could feel, and imagined she 
could almost smell - that the juices of her sex were spreading beneath 
the hair covered mound.

Concentrating on the warmth radiating from her sex and the fullness she 
felt, Amanda drew in a deep breath, and then... BANG!

The book slid of her stomach and the floor between the bed and the wall 
with a crash, the sound shattering Amanda's fantasies in an instant.  
Turning with a sigh to pick up the book, Amanda vowed to keep on with 
her studies for the night, and banish the fantasies until later.

Before she could reach down to grab the book, however, her eye caught a 
large picture of John hanging on the wall, and her hand flew, unbidden, 
to cover the warmth of her mound, beneath the panties that were now 
growing damp with her arousal.

She shocked even herself when one slender finger slipped inside the 
warmth and wet, resting comfortable between her swollen lips.  What 
shocked her, more though, was to find her eyes wandering from John's 
face and settling on a wallet sized picture of the other.

At first she felt shame, remembering the night with him, the secret she 
had to keep, the fleeting moments when she felt more loved than she had  
ever been before.

It was hard to keep him from her mind now, though, with the one finger 
slowly stroking up and down.  Soon, she accepted the images, the 
remembrance from that night, and started to let herself imagine it was 
his fingers inside of her.

She still lay on her side, her eyes now fluttering closed.  She 
imagined him laying beside her, encircling her with his arms and 
caressing her.  Focussing on this images, Amanda caressed herself, 
letting the wet finger slip in a little deeper, into the silken tunnel 
of her womanhood, then a little deeper, and a little deeper, sliding 
and slowly back and forth in a gentle rhythm to the beating of her 
heart.

With one hand working slowly inside of her, she let the other flow up 
and down her body, over and around her breast, down to the clitoris and 
back again, dragging a faint trail of the heady juices of her desire.

She could almost feel the heat from John's imagined body now, 
fantasizing about him.  She imagined feeling his hardness between her 
legs, envisioning her fingers as the tip of him penetrating her, 
filling her.  As thought they possessed a mind of their own her hips 
began to rock back and forth, surrounding and squeezing the finger - 
now fingers - inside of her.

While she slowly fucked the wet fingers, felling them slide in and out 
with her thrust, she used the other hand to gently pinch at her nipple, 
rolling the small hardness between her fingers, squirming with the 
intensity of the sensation and moaning softly.

Her face, her whole body, felt flushed, as she undulated, the muscles 
of her tunnel griping the fingers, squeezing and caressing them, as the 
muscles in her body began their slow tensing.

She was rocking her hips furiously now, imagining his hands at her 
breast, his lips working at her shoulder, and his erection inside of 
her.  She imagined him coming, imagined him filling her as he had done 
before, her breathing desperate as her sex contracted fiercely around 
her fingers, fluttering in powerful orgasm.

Slowly, the contractions slowed, became a slow wave, then ceased, as 
she lay, exhausted and panting, as though he had been there to ravish 
her in reality as well as fantasy.

As she caught her breath, her mind turned with the guilty pleasure of 
her fantasy, her lips no longer quivering now, but her mind churning as 
though it would never be still.

Without even knowing it, she reached up and turned the small lamp off, 
and lay in the glow of the candle, alone with her thoughts.

Eventually the vanilla-scented light of the candle grew dim, vanished 
in an invisible trail of smoke, and Amanda dropped into sleep.  To 
sleep - perchance, to dream.