Copyright © 1997  Master Wade.  ALL Rights Reserved.



This story may not be reproduced in any form for profit without

the written permission of the author.  This story may be freely

distributed with this notice attached.  The author may be contacted

through mrdouble@ix.netcom.com.















MRWADE.237                                     By Master Wade







                            Carmen



                      (Carmin de Labios)



                   (Esclava de Amo de Deseo)







     Dan Gibson fast-forwarded the videotape to a spot that 

he particularly enjoyed watching. It was a scene of his girl 

fucking other men, and the entire tape was full of such 

images. It was one of thirty tapes now, all of his girl. 

There would be more to come.



     Dan's girl, a beautiful dark-haired woman of Cuban 

descent named Carmen, had spent the first thirty-six years of 

her life denying most of her desires, trying to make other 

people happy.  She had always felt a great need to do that, 

and it angered her at times.  Wasn't her happiness of 

importance as well?



     Finally deciding that her happiness was just as 

important as anyone elses, Carmen divorced her husband. 

Feeling a great sense of new freedom, and looking back on a 

life which had seen her take only four lovers in all her 

years, Carmen prepared herself for a new world of passion and 

pleasure, only to find that it was not all that she had 

dreamed of it being.  Casual sex meant nothing to her. She 

longed for something more meaningful; something hot, but 

meaningful at the same time.  It was then that she met Dan.



Dan was somehow different from the other men Carmen had met. 

It was not that he was less interested in her sexually; she 

would hardly be interested in someone who was not. Dan seemed 

to need more than that too.  But what?  At first it was 

difficult for her to tell; she only knew there was something 

more that he wanted from her, and that his need was 

compelling to her, and seemed to draw her to him in a very 

powerful way.  She wanted to ask, but wasn't even sure how to 

phrase her question. So she waited. Finally, he brought it up 

himself.



     "Come here and sit with me, Carmen," he said, on one of 

the nights that she visited him at his home and prepared his 

dinner for him.  "I need to talk with you."



     Carmen smiled and sat next to him on the big over-

stuffed couch.  They talked often, and on many subjects. She 

loved being alone with him and just talking.



     "I think you know me pretty well by now. I feel as if I 

know you, anyway, and I very much like what I know about you. 

I've told you a great deal about me; about my family and my 

past relationships; about my dreams and aspirations. But 

there is something that I haven't felt free to tell you, and 

I want to do that now.

     "For the last four or five years, I have lived something 

of a double life.  Very few people know about this. Most who 

do live far away from here, and know me only as a name on the 

computer.  A select few have met me and have known me in 

person for brief periods of time and are aware of this other 

life of mine."



     Carmen was intrigued, and just a little worried by Dan's 

revelation.  A double life?  Was this man about to tell her 

that he was a spy, or a CIA agent?  What on earth was this 

leading up to?



     "I know I'm causing you some concern by being so 

mysterious, so let me get to the point quickly," he said, 

brushing her hair back over her shoulder.  "I am known to 

some other people by a name you have never heard me called. 

That name is Desi, and it is short for another name which 

those same people know me by: Master of Desire."



     Carmen felt a tightening in her stomach. Desi?  Master 

of Desire?  What did all this mean?



     "I know you will have questions, but let me tell you 

what I must before you ask anything.  The name Master of 

Desire reflects my involvement in something called Dominance 

and submission.  It is a lifestyle which recognizes the 

natural dominant and submissive natures of people, and which 

embraces them in a manner which provides for the mutual 

satisfaction of needs. I became attracted to it through my 

involvement in some online communities, and have since 

explored it both online and off. I have found it to be very 

important to me, and it is inconcievable to me now that I 

could be involved in a relationship of permanence without it 

being a part of our way of life.  I am very attracted to you, 

and I need to tell you about this other life of mine, and to 

see how you will respond to it."



     Carmen was somewhat taken back by Dan's admission. She 

knew a little something of the kind of lifestyle he was 

speaking of; at least she thought she did. It sounded very 

Californian to her, and brought with it images of people 

dressed in leather wielding whips and belonging to motorcycle 

gangs.  Dan was interested in this?



     "I don't know what you know about Dominance and 

submission, or D/s as we call it for convenience sake. I 

expect that if you know anything at all about it, you have 

many misconceptions.  Most people do. I know I certainly did, 

prior to exploring it on my own. And, I can't really say that 

I have embraced it in the same way that many others have. I 

have my own style and my own philosophy."

     "I know very little, but it all sounds very bizarre to 

me, Dan. I'm surprised, and I don't know that I like what 

you're telling me," Carmen said, with genuine concern.

     "I understand," he said, placing his hand on hers. "I 

know I am taking a risk by telling you these things. But D/s 

meets deep needs that I have had all my life, and which I 

know I cannot find satisfaction for outside of this kind of 

lifestyle.  You may decide that you could never share that 

kind of life with me; and if you do, we need to find that out 

as soon as possible, for both our sakes.

     "I care for you very much, Dan. You know that I do. And 

I will listen to anything you have to say. Just know that I 

can't make you any promises. I won't lie to you, or decieve 

you about my feelings, because I can tell you are very 

serious about this. And I won't condemn you for being 

interested in it. I just don't know that I can share it with 

you."

     "I know, Carmen. And there is a part of me that almost 

wishes it were not so important to me, and that I could just 

build a life with you whether or not D/s could be a part of 

that life we share. But I know that would never work, and I 

know that I have to be honest with you now, or else lie to 

you for the rest of my life."



     Dan and Carmen talked for a long time that night. He 

told her everything about his involvement in D/s up to that 

point.  He shared his history of being a dominant man and his 

frustration through the years at not having a suitable outlet 

for that part of his personality.  He spoke honestly to her 

of other women he had known, and what he had shared with them 

and learned from them. And he spoke openly with her about his 

dreams and hopes for the future.



     Carmen left Dan's house that night very much confused. 

She felt a strong attraction to Dan, and thought she had come 

to know him well.  And yet he had been living a secret life 

of which she had no knowledge at all.  It was clear to her 

that this man she was beginning to love was just as much this 

Desi as he was Dan.  He was just as deeply committed to and 

involved in being this Master of Desire as he was to being 

the Dan Gibson she had known all these months.  She felt 

cheated somehow, that he had held this from her for so long. 

And yet she understood that it was not something that he 

could admit quickly and early in a relationship.



     Things were awkward between Dan and Carmen the next time 

they were together.  Carmen still couldn't decide what to 

make of Dan's dual nature, and she no longer felt as if she 

knew who he was.  She told him she needed some time to think 

about all the things he had told her. She said she needed 

some time away from him; some time alone.



     Dan was deeply disappointed.  He had taken a great risk 

in exposing himself so totally to Carmen. He had wanted 

desperately for her to understand and for her to accept him 

as he was. He had despised living that secret life and 

keeping it all from her, and had longed for the time when he 

could tell her all about it, and finally be real to her. Now, 

he had done that, and a great gulf had opened between them.



     Over the coming weeks and months, Dan tried diligently 

to restore his relationship with Carmen. He called regularly, 

but she was often out, or simply didn't answer her phone. He 

left messages, asking for her to return his calls, but she 

did not. And when he was able to talk with her she had very 

little to say, and could never talk very long.



     Dan's friends, those who knew him as Desi, or Master of 

Desire, grieved with him during this period. He had spoken to 

them of Carmen, and of his love for her, and they could see 

the sincerity in his remarks and the genuineness of his 

desire to build a life with her. They were concerned about 

him, and for him, and they tried to take some of the sting 

out of his disappointment, but met with little success. 

Aware, themselves, of the futility of loving someone who 

could not share his D/s needs and interests with him, Dan's 

friends encouraged him to look elsewhere and to let Carmen 

go. But he could not. He sensed more than confusion in 

Carmen; he sensed also a submissive nature that he had 

learned to recognize with dependable accuracy in women. He 

was confident it was there, but she was allowing him almost 

no means through which to touch her and help her become aware 

of it herself.  He was frustrated, and sad, and alone.



     It was at about this time that Carmen began receiving 

letters in the mail from an "Annonymous Friend". The letters 

were not so much letters as they were stories; erotic stories 

of Masters and their slaves. Sure that they must be coming 

from Dan, she called him, and asked.



     "Are you sending these to me," she asked, trying to 

sound calm, but a bit angry that he would do such a thing.

     "No. I am not. Honestly, Carmen, I am not. I suppose it 

may be some of my friends...but I don't even know how they 

would have gotten your address. I know nothing of it. Nothing 

at all. Honest!"

     "Tell your friends that I have no desire to receieve 

such trash in my mail, and that if they don't stop I will 

turn the letters over to the Post Office and let them put a 

stop to it. And tell them soon."  With that, Carmen hung up 

the phone.



     The letters did not stop. In fact, they came more 

frequently, and the stories in them grew even more nasty. 

Carmen was disgusted by them, but still could not avoid 

reading them when they came.  She found herself going back to 

them and reading them over again. And again.  Little by 

little they began making inroads into her fantasies, and in 

spite of her intellectual desire to deny them any power at 

all with her, she felt them touching her in places she had 

never been touched before.  She began picturing herself as 

one of these slaves in the stories, and doing so became 

incredibly exciting for her. It got to the point that it was 

only such fantasies that could arouse her, no matter how hard 

she tried to fight it.  She wondered if Dan, or Desi, did the 

things in these stories. She wondered what it would be like 

to be Master of Desire's slave and serve him as these women 

in these stories served their Masters.  Finally, she called 

Dan.



     "I need to talk with you, in person," she said, softly 

into the phone.

     "Of course. Would you like to come over tonight?", he 

asked, surprised, but pleased.

     "Yes, if you don't mind. Eight okay?"

     "Eight is fine. I'll see you then."



     Carmen was late arriving, and Dan had almost decided she 

had changed her mind. But the doorbell finally rang, and she 

sat next to him on the big couch again for the first time in 

many months.



     "It's been a long time, Carmen," Dan said, smiling at 

her warmly. "I'm glad you're here."

     "Thank you for letting me come. I've got something to 

tell you, and I'm not sure how to do it. I only know that I 

have to."

     "Sure. You can tell me anything. I've missed you."

     "I've missed you too, Dan. I know it may not have seemed 

like it, but I have felt very alone, and frightened, and 

lost. But what I want to tell you about has to do with these 

letters you've been sending me."

     "Carmen," Dan said, with total honesty, "I have not been 

sending you any letters. I swear to you. And I spoke to my 

friends, and none of them would admit sending you anything. 

Do you have one with you?  Let me see some of them...perhaps 

I can tell who they are from."

     "No, I don't have any with me. And if you say you 

haven't been sending them, then I suppose I have to believe 

you. I almost wish that you had been...now. My feelings about 

them has changed.  That's one thing I need to tell you, and 

to talk to you about."

     "Go ahead. How have your feelings changed?  Tell me."

     "At first, as you know, I was highly offended by the 

letters. They aren't just letters, Dan, they are dirty 

stories. It's pornography, pure and simple. But in spite of 

the fact that I was disgusted by them I continued reading 

them. And even though I tried to ignore them, they kept 

creeping into my fantasies and day-dreams. It's gotten to the 

point that the things that take place in those stories are 

all that I can think about at times."

     "I see," Dan said, contemplating the meaning of all 

this. "What are the stories about?"

     "They are Master and slave stories. D/s stories, I guess 

you would call them. But Dan there are things in them that I 

never found exciting before; things that any woman in her 

right mind would find repulsive. Yet I don't...not anymore, 

anyway. I want those things. I want the very dirtiest and 

nastiest things in them, Dan. And I don't mean that I simply 

find the idea of them exciting. I mean that I want them to 

happen to me in my real life."

     "What sorts of things?  What is it that you want to 

happen to you in real life?", he asked.

     "I can't tell you. I mean...well, I want to tell you, 

but I can't, yet. I don't know what you do, Dan. I don't know 

what happens to women who are your slaves. I don't know 

anything much about what being a slave to you means. I don't 

even know that I trust you enough to tell you any more than I 

already have.  I just know that I had to talk to someone 

about these stories, and that I had to let you know that they 

are changing me."



     Dan and Carmen talked a bit longer that night, but 

Carmen was not ready to open up much to him yet, and Dan was 

still unsure how much to tell her about his own style of D/s, 

and the deep personal needs that he found fulfilled by it.



     Wishing for more openess, and hoping for a rapid 

increase in intimacy between them, Dad found Carmen to be 

very cautious and hesitant.  She had intrigued him by her 

admission, but was denying him a chance to see her hungers up 

close; to know them completely.



     Over the next several weeks, Dan revealed more and more 

of himself to Carmen in their talks. She responded by opening 

up some herself, but it was obvious that she still didn't 

trust him enough to tell him everything.  What he did learn 

excited him tremendously, and made him want to know more. It 

made him want Carmen even more, as well, and he began 

thinking more and more of the possibilities of a life shared 

with her.  But every time that Dan felt he was finally 

getting to the point that Carmen would let her guard down 

completely, she would withdraw from him, and return to her 

old habits of not returning his calls, of seeming to have no 

interest in him at all.  Then she would warm to him again, 

and thrill him by spending time with him, only to withdraw 

yet again.



     Finally, Dan could stand it no longer, and he sat Carmen 

down one night and spoke to her seriously.



     "I have known from the very beginning that you are a 

submissive, Carmen. I can sense it...my instincts about it 

are very accurate, and I know that it's there, living inside 

you.  And your admissions to me over the last few weeks have 

made that even more clear to me. We want so many of the same 

things. I can feel it, even though I know you still are 

hiding things from me.

     "Nothing will take the place of you submitting to a 

Master, Carmen. There is no way for you to escape that. You 

can fantasize, you can dream, you can spend all your free 

time with me talking about it or re-reading the stories you 

were sent...but none of that can truly mean anything unless 

you submit.  If you are really submissive in your heart, and 

I KNOW that you are, then you have to submit. Nothing else 

will ever satisfy you. You cannot be fulfilled without it. 

Why do you fight it so?"

     "I'm just not ready. I don't know what it is, but I'm 

just not ready."

     "You can't go on this way forever, Carmen. How will you 

even know for sure if this is what you want, if you don't try 

it?  How can you continue to dream and want something that 

you aren't willing to give a try? I KNOW you must feel the 

need inside you. I KNOW you must be as hungry for it as I am. 

Surely you must trust me enough by now to be able to try it 

with me. Surely you know me well enough that you know my love 

and desire for you is real. What have I done all these months 

while I have been waiting for you?  Have I deserted you? Have 

I ignored you, or gone on to experience D/s with someone 

else?"



     Carmen thought about all the things that Dan was saying 

to her. He was right, of course, but the idea of giving 

herself so completely to someone terrified her. Yes, she 

loved Dan...she no longer tried to deny that to herself or to 

him.  Yes, she needed him in her life. She knew that as well. 

But to be a slave...a real slave...to a man in real life? How 

could she do that?  How could she not?



     Carmen slipped from the couch to the floor in front of 

Dan. Kneeling, her hands behind her back, she spoke softly to 

him.



     "You're right, Master. I can't fight it any longer. I 

beg you: Please take me as your slave. I give you everything 

I am. I am yours totally, for you to own and possess. I want 

to belong to you and be yours always, and in all ways."



Continued in Chapter Two....















--





Double for Nothing!!  Tricks for Free!!!



http://pw1.netcom.com/~mrdouble/main/stories.html



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